Lines of worries appeared with age

Every year the council has to survey a few thousand people in the Borough to find the answers to a suite of fatuous questions set by H.M. Government. The funding for social services in your area is determined by the number of people who give the correct answer to "Is your dog's name Lucky?"

The council's decided that it's going to do a staff softener-upper prior to this year's effort. It's been posted onto the corporate extranet and we're all invited to join in.

"In a team, or by yourself, answer the questions, complete the form, send it in and you could win a prize!"

Hmm. Four of the first ten questions are about pubs in the Borough. It doesn't need a lot of paranoia to suspect that this is just a way of identifying the piss artists with time on their hands who wouldn't be missed in the event of another financial crisis.