Exploding spiders and how to make them

T.Aldous is having to speak to the Spadespit Civic Society, who are up in arms at the prospect of Spadspit Library moving into a new Community Centre, also housing a clinic, a community arts venue and a learning suite. Complaints include:

"Why will there only be 48 parking spaces? They'll all be taken up by library staff." (There are two staff in this library)

"People won't want to borrow books when they're waiting to see the doctor."

"People won't want to use the library if it's full of people wanting to go to the clinic."

"There isn't any vandalism at the existing library any more: we've got a new skateboard park in Milkbeck." (Yes there is. And Milkbeck is four miles away, the other side of the reservoir.)

T.Aldous is quite sanguine about the silly stuff as he's checked with me and he knows that the two people making sensible noises are also the only two who are members of the library in the first place.