I am da masta! I have found out that I can beat yor security. I have looked at yor files because I am a pretty good expert and I know that the passwords for yor computers in Sheep City is sheep and how I know this is that I can read yor password. I can in yor system and I can know good how it works. I want you let the newspapers know what I can do to you.
I pass it on to IT Security. If I were working my notice -- or if I were working my passage for a medical discharge (ooh matron!) -- I'd have sent him this reply:
We have found out that you are an illiterate moron with a small dick. We want that you let your girlfriend know this but we know you haven't got one.