We're taking a bit of a breather while the world rearranges its underpants. Meanwhile, the other blog is here.

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

I told them you're a big game hunter

Project management at the work place:
  • Somebody asks the library service to do something. (Obviously, if somebody within the library service suggests that we need to do something then no further action is necessary.)
  • Policy Team members blather about it awhile in an inconsequential manner until one of them blinks. They are deemed to be Taking The Lead On The Project.
  • The piece of work is mentioned to somebody in passing
    • at the end of a long meeting about something else entirely that's got an action list a yard long; or
    • by the photocopier; or
    • by the door to the toilets.
    The work has now Been Delegated.
  • Some days, or weeks, later the same piece of work is mentioned in passing, in similar circumstances, to somebody else. A Project Team Has Been Set Up.
  • A chance conversation between the two people reveals:
    • they are supposed to be delivering a piece of work;
    • they are supposed to be delivering the same piece of work;
    The Project Has Been Scoped.
  • By pooling their resources and making a long sequence of educated guesses they find out that they have about 85% of the information required to try and make any progress.
    The Project Has Been Resourced.
  • Any attempt to make up the remaining 15% will be blanked because it requires a member of Policy Team to:
    • make a decision;
    • remember what the decision was; and
    • be prepared to be accountable for it.
    The Project Has Been Fucked.

"We'll be needing staff to take a lot more responsibility in the days ahead."


Madame DeFarge said...

Ah but there's no one from finance on the project. You always need one of us to say you can't afford it. It's traditional.

Berowne said...

It's Dilbert! He's alive and well over at your place...

Kevin Musgrove said...

Madame DeF: no one from finance is ever on the project. People from finance are related to projects in pretty much the same way that brick walls are related to crash test dummies.

Berowne: thank you! There are many days when I am very scared you may be right.

Pat said...

Do you have anyone taking notes during meetings? I fear for their sanity.

Kevin Musgrove said...

Pat: notes?! meeting?!